As another Christmas approaches, I am trying to look forward to next year to see if I can find a way to have someone to share the holidays with next year. This being alone during this time of the year is pretty grim. But everyone I meet has a family to share the holidays.

​I could find someone just to be with, if I tried, but, as usual I am finding it difficult to meet someone "like" me. I seem to be so different from the people I meet now. That is not to say I am unique - I am not - but my life has opened doors that others have not experienced. I left my home town 33 years ago. I went there recently and found it was not my home town "now." I have changed more than it has.

​Even those former places that I have lived do not do it for me any longer. Maybe I have a mental condition that requires constant stimulation from new things - I bet there is a name for it. I just know I want more than I have, and I do not care that I am considered old. In order to thrive I need new stimulating experiences, not just something to do to kill time until I die. And that my friends, seems to be the kind of people I have surrounding me now.

​I have learned a very good lesson and that it is I do not want to be around my age group, alone. I want to meet the young and hear their dreams.  I want to "act" younger than I am and experience my own new dreams. I am not satisfied with the status quo; I guess I never have been and that is why my "ole" friends do not understand me.

​I do not have children or grandchildren which separates me even more from my "cronies." I have an old dog who will not live much longer and I will be totally alone. BUT that does not really scare me, since I am basically alone most of the time. I call people, but they do not call me that  often. I am just too damned independant for most.

​But that is who I am, really, and to pretend otherwise would be unfaithful to myself. So I have to figure out how to live life on my conditions and finance it. Maybe I will get a new idea before the New Year arrives. Who knows, maybe a benefactor will finance a new adventure.

Well, that birthday that I have dreaded has finally arrived -that 70 year mark.

​At 70, I guess I finally have to admit that I am getting older. I do not feel old, except in the older body, but I attribute all thos aches and pains to a severe illness I had 8 years ago. But if the calendar says it is December 4, 2016, and I was born December 4, 1946, that seems to calculate to 70 years.

​Wow! Where did the time go? It seems like yesterday that I was celebating my 16th birthday. That is almost 55 years ago. It could not have been that long ago.

​But then I start remembering (as old folks do) all the wonderful times and events in my past. My first kiss and my first husband and getting my hard earned degree from MUS (took 10 years of putting myself through), and my first teaching job, and my first adventure moving to another state, etc. That last adventure  was over 35 years ago.

​So I guess I have been around living my life the way I want to for 70 years That first move started a whole new adventure of moving to other cities and states - meeting all kinds of new people from all over the world. ( My friends thought I was crazy and maybe I was...crazy for adventure.) I actually lived in the DC area and worked there. What an experience that was!

​I have given it all for love, too many times, and have climbed back (more slowly now) to become Peggy again. I have found in my vast years of experience, not everone can take "Peggy" so she has had to move to just below the surface in most relatonships.

​But now I am reationship free and Peggy has returned. I got wounded along the way and it was a struggle to come back. But I m back - a bit older, but defintely wiser and ready for adventure.

​This 70'th year, I am determned to return to loving every day of my life, reveling in my freedom of entanglements, and bascially exploring all the wonderful possiblities that are out there.

​I hope you will come along for the ride for as long as it is there. It may be quite a while yet.