I could find someone just to be with, if I tried, but, as usual I am finding it difficult to meet someone "like" me. I seem to be so different from the people I meet now. That is not to say I am unique - I am not - but my life has opened doors that others have not experienced. I left my home town 33 years ago. I went there recently and found it was not my home town "now." I have changed more than it has.
Even those former places that I have lived do not do it for me any longer. Maybe I have a mental condition that requires constant stimulation from new things - I bet there is a name for it. I just know I want more than I have, and I do not care that I am considered old. In order to thrive I need new stimulating experiences, not just something to do to kill time until I die. And that my friends, seems to be the kind of people I have surrounding me now.
I have learned a very good lesson and that it is I do not want to be around my age group, alone. I want to meet the young and hear their dreams. I want to "act" younger than I am and experience my own new dreams. I am not satisfied with the status quo; I guess I never have been and that is why my "ole" friends do not understand me.
I do not have children or grandchildren which separates me even more from my "cronies." I have an old dog who will not live much longer and I will be totally alone. BUT that does not really scare me, since I am basically alone most of the time. I call people, but they do not call me that often. I am just too damned independant for most.
But that is who I am, really, and to pretend otherwise would be unfaithful to myself. So I have to figure out how to live life on my conditions and finance it. Maybe I will get a new idea before the New Year arrives. Who knows, maybe a benefactor will finance a new adventure.