I have always poo-pooed older people who did not go out in the rain for their outings. I still go, but it seems more of a hassle. I have to walk so far when I go to the Y (one street over) and with an umbrella and a cane, it is not easy. So some days, I postpone my trip to the Y if it is raining hard. But that’s not all.
I have several things I need to do on my laptop, but I am postponing it all. Another hassle! It involves reading complicated directions to accomplish something I really want to do. I also need to reprogram my DVD player since getting Comcast. This also involves getting out the instructions and following them step by step. I did both things a couple of years ago and I must admit I sweated a bit then. Now I seem to be postponing these two things, even though both would make my life better. Why am I doing this?
I used to be challenged by new things and products. I could not wait to figure everything out. I was an IT specialist a few years ago and I accomplished amazing things, if I say so myself. Everyone in my department thought I was unbelievably smart and great at what I did. Now all this does not seem like fun any longer.
The problem here, I believe, is that old brain. It has been around for all those illnesses and traumas with my body. I try to challenge it daily – I play games, I read, I do this website. But I must need something else to get me going – brain wise. I go to the Y to work physically on my body. But I must need more for my brain. What can I do?
Is this old age or just being tired of hassles? I have had many in my life. I have come back from the dead once; I have come back from extreme poverty twice. I have survived divorce more than once; I have conquered being totally alone without family or friends several times. My life has been a struggle and I wonder if that is what all this procrastination is about. Am I old or am I just tired?
I know that I will eventually fix that laptop thing and I will reprogram that DVD player. I will walk in the rain with my umbrella and cane, too. I will do these things, because I do not want to give up being “young at heart.” I do not want to be “old” in my mind, either. I am just going to have to keep plugging along, accomplishing what I need to do
It really is about attitude and perseverance, I believe – not old age.